Direct mp3 download or play:  Me Sneezing

This is dumb, but I just had to let you hear the sound of me sneezing. I recorded it on a Sony ICD-SX700 voice recorder on February 14, 2010, Valentine’s Day. I was sitting in a vehicle in the Walgreens parking lot on Rainier Avenue South in Seattle and I started to sneeze, repeatedly.

Direct mp4 download or play:  The Weatherman

Here’s a little film I found on the internet. It’s a bit goofy (like me) and hopefully, it will make you laugh.

Direct mp4 download or play:  Aphex Twin – Bank of America (original version)

Here is the original version of a Bank of America commercial from the fall of 1997 that appears to have the music of Aphex Twin. The piece is Girl/Boy Song, released in 1996. Note the beginning of the commercial is cut off for a second or so.

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Direct mp4 download or play:  Aphex Twin – Bank of America (alternate version)

This is another version of the same commercial, with a sort of watered down “easy listening” version of what sounds like Girl/Boy Song. I don’t know if Aphex Twin performed this music.

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Direct mp4 download or play:  Aphex Twin – Bank of America (other alternate “easy listening” version)

Here is another version of the commercial with the alternate “easy listening” music with different dialogue.

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Direct mp3 download or play:  Aphex Twin – Bank of America – left/right comparison

This audio has the original Bank of America commercial on the left channel, (voice over and sound effects) and on the right channel the part of the Aphex Twin piece (Girl/Boy Song) mixed to mono, featured in the commercial. The music is fairly well synchronized, so if you fade the sound left and right, I think you will agree the music is identical.

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More information about this commercial, and the Bank of America “motion” campaign of 1997 can be found here. There is no mention of Aphex Twin in that article, however. I can remember being a little perturbed when I first saw these commercials. I always wanted to point out that some artists have sell out sometimes. In fact a lot of artists have to sell out in order to survive or maintain a lifestyle. Of course, Negativland would never do anything like that at least not that I know of.  As for me personally at this time, I merely wanted to point this out, and I am neither for or against the commercial, although I have thought about it on and off for over 10 years!

Direct mp4 download or play:  Sniveling – Part 1

Part 1

Direct mp4 download or play:  Sniveling – Part 2

Part 2

This is something really dumb and I’ve probably said it before, but this performance may convince you that I must be out of my mind. There is a more sane explanation, however. As you may know I rarely perform with Negativland, and other members of the group were always trying to figure out how to have my “presence” on stage, even though I wasn’t actually there. Since a lot of what Negativland is about, (TV, radio, movies, mass media in general) what better way than to have my face appear on TV screens. After some thought, I came up with the idea of video taping myself and giving the tape to the group to use as they please during live performances. In this video, I was to appear to have some sort of a problem on camera, but not making it clear what could be wrong.
I decided on the name “sniveling” for a couple of reasons. First of all, I like the sound of the word “sniveling.” Secondly, I think some of things I do on the video may fit the definition of sniveling. In order to attract the attention of the audience I tried to keep continuously moving my head. One thing that seems odd is that I appear to be smiling or enjoying myself, when in fact maybe I should have been grimacing more or in general look more angry and distressed. To be honest, since I am considered to be a recluse or curmudgeon, I don’t even recall if the band actually used this video in a performance. Maybe someone could clear that up. Enjoy, have a laugh!

SILLY ANGRY WEATHERMAN SEPTEMBER 9, 1989

Direct mp3 download or play:  A Goofy Dumb Halloween ’09

This is something I made for an “Over The Edge” show sometime in the 1980s or 90s. I can’t recall how I made this, but I think I had records playing on two turntables.

****HAVE A GOOFY DUMB HALLOWEEN****

Direct mp3 download or play:  Distorted Accordion

I’m embarrassed, but here I go again trying to make music. This was recorded around the same time as “Distorted Guitar and Voice,” using the same technique. Some of you have requested more stuff like this and I hope you enjoy!

Direct mp3 download or play:  Whatever Whatever

Here is an odd little bit I made with the voice of a strange woman I found on the internet. I know it has been awhile, and as usual I’m lazy, but I can assure you there is more stuff to come.

Direct mp4 download or play:  Steaming In My Underwear

Earlier in June this year, I had Indian food, and as luck would have it, some curry sauce got on the carpet under my dinner table. I wasn’t too pleased and I decided to clean the carpet with my Eureka Enviro Steamer. It was fairly warm that day, so I decided to strip down to my underwear while I cleaned the carpet. Unfortunately, all of this happened while I was being visited by a friend. My friend, who goes by the name of Gorpisnorb, decided to document this by using the built-in camera and microphone on his Apple MacBook. If you are wondering if there was anything of a sexual nature happening, I’ll nip that in the bud by assuring you this little episode was all about cleaning the dirty carpet, except maybe when I mentioned Frank Zappa and the Edgewater Inn.

Direct mp4 download or play:  Isis The Cat Head

Isis The Cat tries out for Cat Head Theatre! More information about Cat Head Theatre and its creator, Tim Maloney, is available  here and at www.nakedrabbit.com.

Direct mp4 download or play:  The Neighbors of Woodcraft

I acquired this filmstrip projector in the mid 1980s. This machine sat on the top shelf of a closet at my home in Martinez, California and then in a cupboard at my home in Seattle until 2004. In the fall of 2004, I captured the filmstrip and the built-in cassette tape audio on my digital camcorder and transferred it to a computer where it sat until now. I was never satisfied with the image quality mainly because the middle of the image is brighter. Also if you listen closely you can hear a low frequency tone (around 50 HZ) come on when the film advances. It is a control tone on the cassette tape which activates the film advance mechanism; although I think I filtered most of it out. There are still some clicks when the tone turns on and off.

This filmstrip is self explanatory but you learn more about The Neighbors of Woodcraft building in Portland, Oregon by going to The Tiffany Center website.

Direct mp3 download or play:  Distorted Guitar & Voice

Here is something really nutty. I’m trying to remember more about this recording. There was a time in the early 1970s that I became interested in Jimi Hendrix, but not for long. That’s probably why this tape is unmarked. Anything that I create that has some resemblance to music, I’m usually somewhat embarrassed to present.
First of all It’s probably an insult to Jimi Hendrix. Secondly, I don’t read music and I am not a musician. The sound quality is similar to “Bicycle Horn Under Water,” and I think an early version of The Booper, modified to amplify and produce heavy distortion is involved. Also a dynamic microphone was placed inside or on the strings of my grandfather’s acoustic guitar. The guitar strings were struck or plucked with my fingers and I made noises and said words with my mouth.
I am quite sure this was recorded using my Norelco 1530 monaural cassette recorder. In addition, I don’t recall presenting this to Negativland or playing it on Over The Edge, so if a certain individual who may be holding his head and laughing by the name of Mark, feel free to correct me.

The tape with this recording

Careful X rated!

Direct mp3 download or play:  Nymphomaniac

Here for the first time is the original source material for “The Playboy Channel” from the Negativland release “Escape From Noise.” This is the entire recording, unedited without any audio processing. I must warn you, however, that it is “X” rated!

Direct mp4 download or play:  I Want You To Ram Me

Careful, I think I just made a pornographic video! It features part of movie which can be viewed in its entirety here. Most of the sound is from the internet. Some of the sound was used on a Negativland album. Can you guess which album and the name of the song?

Direct mp3 download or play:  Where Are My Cigarettes? – Part 1

Part 1

Direct mp3 download or play:  Where Are My Cigarettes? – Part 2

Part 2

Here are the original recordings that I made with my mother in the early 1980’s. I used my Superscope C-104 monaural cassette recorder. This recorder has a line input and automatic record level only, so the sound is quite compressed and noisy. Also, the room (my bedroom in Martinez, California) didn’t have much to absorb the sound, which accounted for the reverberant sound quality.  I think I used Sony F-98 dynamic microphones and an inexpensive older RadioShack mixer with no level meters. I may have had my dbx 161 compressors in line as well and as far as I know there was never a stereo version of these recordings. You can hear how Part 2 was used on the third Negativland release “A Big 10-8 Place” in the piece called “180-G: A Big 10-8 Place Part Two.”

Direct mp4 download or play:  Piezoelectric Transducer

This is another bit from the same session as “Microphone Test Part 1.” The only things I did to the sound were putting fades at the beginning and end and limiting the peak level to – .4db. This is the largest file I have put up so far, so let me know how difficult it is to play.

Direct mp4 download or play:  Angry Counting Weatherman

Alternate version – less audio processing

Direct mp4 download or play:  Angry Counting Weatherman – less audio processing

Just thought I’d get in your face.

Direct mp3 download or play:  Very Bad Reception

Here is a little thing I made using a cordless phone and a radio. I discovered that my cordless phone appears to transmit on several different frequencies. In addition I’m using a wireless phone extender, the same type cable TV companies used to use for digital cable boxes to automatically call in billing data for pay-per-view movies. I have several of these units and they work fine for regular telephone use. The phone extender has a main frequency of 3.5 MHz and weaker signals at 7 MHz and 14 MHz and transmits in wide band FM. The cordless phone handset transmits on 46.6 MHz to 47 MHz and its base unit is on 49.6 MHz to 50 MHz. The handset can change frequencies in its range depending on reception. The phone itself transmits on narrow band FM.

I connected an inexpensive RadioShack multiband radio (model SW-100) to my small Yamaha mixer (model MG10/2). I then connected one of my DBX 161 compressors to send and return on the mixer. The mixer line out connected to my PC computer with a Soundblaster SE soundcard. The output from the computer soundcard feeds into an Alesis Nanocompressor and from there into my H.H. Scott A426 integrated amplifier. The Speakers are older Pioneer model CS-63 with the woofers replaced with Electro-Voice DL-15 speakers. I have added to each speaker a JBL 075 tweeter and a JBL 2402 tweeter. Model 2402 is a newer version of the 075 and looks identical from the front. There are four additional tweeters in all.
Now for the recording. I set the the threshold on the Nanocompressor quite low (-20db) so there could be a lot of feedback without the need to have the speakers very loud and to prevent damage to the amplifier or speakers. The radio was tuned up and down the dial on shortwave and then to about 7 MHz where the wireless phone extender transmits even when the phone is hung up. Then I switched on the cordless phone, waited until the dial tone stopped, listened on the radio and sure enough there was a signal. It was very loud and distorted, but very controlled with audio compression on the mixer and on the output of the soundcard as well. Then I realized the radio was receiving on AM and the wireless phone extender transmits on FM. When you try to receive a broadcast in the wrong mode it will come through very distorted. Once this was established, I just started recording the feedback from my cordless phone. I did not process the recording in any way except since the recording is monaural I’m presenting it here at 80KB mp3 mono.

Updated February 15th, 2020, all video trans-coding performed with Handbrake. https://handbrake.fr/

Direect mp4 download or play – 480 x 360

Download/ Play H265 MKV file – 480 x 360

Download/Play – original full length MPEG 2 capture April 13th, 2008 – 720 by 480

720 x 540 screen capture from original MPEG 2 capture

Here is what happened to a religious TV station earlier this year. I recorded this on April 13th, 2008, but I noticed this channel (CH. 58) was doing this for nearly a month earlier, continuously. Also, it kept it up for several weeks after April 13th. I’m sure the reception was clearer than what was recorded. I simply attached rabbit ears to my computer with an ATI 8500 All-in-Wonder video card and recorded MPEG2 video. I wonder why they left this video on so long or if they simply didn’t care. It looks like some sort of a digital loop. Also this post is a test to see how well the video can be played or downloaded. On my computer the clickable link will play on my Firefox browser when the VLC media plug-in has been installed. If that has been done correctly when you click the link a new browser will open. A black blank page and the words “no video” will appear. Then the video should play. The other options are Flash video and Windows Media. Bear with me, I’ve got alot to learn. You can probably tell my typing, spelling and grammar are not that great. Have fun, comments welcome.

Direct mp3 download or play:  How Dare You

Here it is, the collage that inspired the name of this dumb website. Maybe when you feel like punching a hole in the wall, give this a listen and your “things” will go up. Someday I might explain what “things” are.

Direct mp3 download or play:  Dreamo Sleeping Pills

This is from a recording my father made with a friend sometime in the 1940’s before he was married to my mother. I think it was made on a machine that records sound and cuts a record as well. The record itself is made of cardboard and is coated with some sort of material like vinyl. This one is bright orange and is I think seven inches in diameter. The disc has two holes, the regular one in the middle for playing and another one out about an inch from the middle. I guess the second hole was there to secure the disc when a recording was made. The record plays at 78 rpm and the condition of the surface is so poor (the vinyl like surface is actually cracking) that it is almost not playable. I did manage after several attempts to play and record it into a computer. The record was played on a Newcomb phonograph fitted with a General Electric variable reluctance magnetic cartridge. This unit is all vacuum tubes monophonic and is a combination portable PA system and record player with a twelve inch speaker. What is really nice about the amplifier in this unit is that it has a line level output built in and a dual triode 12AX7 vacuum tube as a phono preamplifier.  We had one of these at Alhambra High School in Martinez, California where I lived as a teenager and beyond. The recording was done on a PC computer running Windows 2000, with an older Creative Soundblaster Audigy soundcard. I think it was the same computer that I recorded “Ambience Recording June 28th, 2008″(you ought to check that out too) before it was upgraded to Windows XP. I had to use lots of noise reduction and dipped the highs around 6700 hertz down to -3 db to combat the extreme surface noise with Adobe Audition. I don’t think I was very successful, but the surface noise was even worse before processing. The sound here is an MP3 at 128 kilobits per second.

Dreamo